You know the gift shop signs? Something about paying more for shoes than your husband knows about. Or about leaving the delivery somewhere your husband won’t find it. Cuteeeee, right? Umm no. Not for me.
Tee hee, boys are so silly, girls love to shop bullshit. I have a sense of humour, I get it. Heck, my father may never know what my mother’s giant stash of scrapbooking stuff is REALLY worth.
But really, it’s not funny.
Having always worked and never having any real major breaks in my income (#blessed), I’ve never asked a partner how I could spend my money. Especially on something as trivial as shoes or clothes. It’s my money, and as long as the bills are paid, I will dispose of my disposable income as I see fit.
I’ve always just wrinkled my nose up at these types of things. Like I mentioned above, my parents never really had ‘rules’ about “his and hers” money, spend limits or clothing budgets, they just figured it out. I can’t imagine doing it any other way.
Kel and I have always run an easy breezy household when it comes to spending money. Major purchases only have to be discussed. And by major I mean, unnecessary. If our washing machine broke, I’d be happy for him to replace it. I just wouldn’t be cool if he decided he wanted a new tv when our current one is perfectly fine.
You get it, right?
We all make our rules, and we can all spend our money within our relationships as we see fit. It’s those darn signs, they make me think of women who have been designated ‘child carer’, or are unwell, or situationally unemployed and give up their disposable income, who are then required to ‘ask’ for money from joint accounts. Ick.
And if you do, that doesn’t make it wrong. At all. There are a number of reasons that you may need to discuss purchases or budget set figures. But if you’re hiding purchases or aren’t “allowed” them at all, well, take a closer look at that. What is this, an allowance or payment for services rendered or something? That’s always given me the willies.
A penny for your thoughts, ladies.
And no, I’m not just saying that to justify the three LARGE packages that just arrived today. I’m a big girl, I know I went overboard. Winter knits, they called to me. Haha. This is about self-sufficiency and equality in your relationships. And only a little bit about how much I hate those stupid gift shop signs.
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Photo by Keagan Henman on Unsplash
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Hi! I’m Melissa Walker Horn. Around here, they call me Suger. I’m the Chief Blogger and doer of all the things here at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; I love a casual ootd, taking photos, and writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet over at Chalkboard Digital. You know, living the sweet life.
These kinds of signs would make me feel guilty about getting parcels and shopping.
Loved your perspective.
Exactly, me too, all sneaky and gross.
The signs are so shallow. And my other half usually tells me to go shopping more than I want to haha. And to spend more. I just wish that a) I liked shopping enough to buy things before they fall apart and b) that I believed spending more = better quality.
I genuinely dislike shopping. Online, no problem! In a centre or mall, heck no. I have found that with a bit of research, I’ve found a few firm favourites that I can count on over and over again. That said, I did pretty much wait for all my shoes to fall apart before I replaced them. Haha.
Great Post! I never had to sneak in shopping bags when I was married. But, I better not let my Mom see me with them. She does not believe in spending much $$ on clothes and of course she hates shopping. I bet she loved wearing her new dress that she found in her closet? LOL.
http://www.madamtoomuch.com
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it.
Haha. Mum’s are strange things sometimes, right? My Mum hates the idea of me spending money on her. But she gets so much joy out of gifts and little treats that it seems silly not to! I mean, why would I stop!?