You thought it was just about you, didn’t you? You thought that the relationship you are having with your body is private and no one else cares. Didn’t you? Well, it’s not true. Your body shame impacts us all. And we kindly request that you stop body shaming yourself. Like now. If not for you, for us. I hope that you’ll do it for you but start with doing it for us.
For the mothers and their daughters, the aunts, nieces, cousins, the sisters and the friends. The lady you bumped into in the shops that one time. For the women who listen to you criticising your body because of an ideal that never existed in a real human anyway. Stop now because you do it so often that they question their own beauty. For all those times, we were brave enough to tell you that you are beautiful, strong and gorgeous just the way you are and you called us liars.
Stop.
We don’t care if you have stretch marks from carrying a baby, from carrying extra weight, or for hitting 6 foot by your 12th birthday. We don’t care if you just got fat, thin or muscle on muscles. Your body deserves your respect and your admiration for the way it carries you every single day and sustains you. Literally. Without it, you’re a head in a jar like on Futurama (I’m pretty sure that science isn’t actually there yet so you’re in trouble).
We deserve better than you perpetuating a myth about beauty being the sole purpose of your body. Who said that you need to be beautiful, the ideal, perfect, to be free from shame? You said anything but perfection is a life sentence of hatred towards yourself? Well, they lied. Beauty may be found in the symmetry of a perfect face or perfectly positioned boobs, but it can also be found in the silvery lines of stretch marks and the crooked nose that dominates the face. It can be found in any old place you look if you stop being blind to what is out there. Shame makes you blind. My guess is you only see imperfection in others too. Faults to be fixed?
We really wish you’d stop doing that.
Most of all do it because you have nothing to be ashamed of. You should stop shaming your body because every time you do you reinforce for everyone out there that your body contains shame. And I’m here to tell you it needn’t. Here to say that it doesn’t matter how you carry your body at what size, shape or state of perfection, how you dress it or what you choose to do with it you have nothing to be ashamed of. No matter what. There is no but coming.
You. Have. NOTHING. To. Be. Ashamed. Of.
Nothing; so kindly stop doing that.
…
Images are taken from Rugged Grace Tumblr.
Read more about the Rugby team that created these images and the powerful message they are sending about body love at the link above.
Hi! I’m Melissa Walker Horn. Around here, they call me Suger. I’m the Chief Blogger and doer of all the things here at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; I love a casual ootd, taking photos, and writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet over at Chalkboard Digital. You know, living the sweet life.
Hit the nail right on the head! Sometimes I think “no one else understands,” then I see a post like this. Thank you for being who you are because it encourages me to be who I am and not hide. 🙂
Thank you and you’re welcome. x
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Munmun Nishi.
Plus Size Fashion
Thank you.
Great post Suger! I see so many people shaming their bodies and it makes me so sad. This is why I became an advocate of body love – and why I’m so glad there are other wonderful people like yourself to help spread this message!
Thank you Meagan. We make a great team teh body love folks. Get into one headspace at a time, that’s all we need to do.
I realised the impact my body shaming has on others when I was in charge of 12 teenagers for 32 days, responsible for their safety and teaching them to sail. One girl was bigger and she really cleaved to me. Told me that I was an inspiration that she could do anything that ‘normal’ girls did, because I was! That really hit home because at that stage, I was faking it. Since then, I have put so much effort into making it real. I look at my body, I think of all the places it’s taken me, all the things we’ve done together. I stop and beleive my husband when he loves my body. Because you’re right. My body shame affected my husband, my sister, and so many others I never even thought about because I was so busy being down on myself! Just like my Mums body shame affected me. When I have kids, I am going to be proud of my body and that will affect them too.
Yes! Thank you for sharing this and for being the example you are for young girls. A strong, outgoing woman who doesn’t have a “perfect” body but lives life to the fullest anyway. So amazing.
This is my favourite thing on the internet today. Thanks Suger – it’s all true. Beauty comes from letting an amazing personality, intellect and sense of humour to shine through to the world. Perpetuating these impossible ‘ideals’ to each other and out children is stupid and hurtful.
Haha. Thank you Marianne. Big points indeed for THAT.
I cant like this post enough – Thank you for saying what needs to be said 🙂
Thank you KP. x