I like direct conversations. Ones that don’t mess around, get to the point and if there’s a request to make it gets made sooner rather than later. This post occurred to me as a good idea after writing one of the emails for the daily subscribers of the Living the Sweet Life Daily. Telling someone to be direct in their communication is one thing, but telling them HOW to do that is another.
So this is me. Hoping to do a little telling you how. Because I’m a professional MOST of the time. Short version. Okay you lot, stop laughing! haha. Are you ready? As far as I am concerned there are five simple ways to have more direct conversations, in my opinion, and here they are;
Know what you want to say and then say it.
Easier said than done sometimes but you need to stop, think about it and then just say it. There is nothing more frustrating {to me} than someone who takes a ridiculous amount of words to say something simple. Direct conversation requires you to be economical with your words. Above all else, practice economy.
Keep your language simple so it can be understood.
I find that language in its diversity and expansiveness can be confusing sometimes. There is a time for elegant words and stylised writing. But when you are communicating in a direct manner, that time is not now.
Speak up, if no one can hear you then what the heck are you doing!?
It sounds silly to have to mention it but you have no idea how many times a day I speak with someone who I have to make the request to repeat themselves, speak louder and to stop muffling their words with a hand or closed mouth. Speak clearly, in a level that can be heard. You are worthy of being heard, trust me, so make sure you can be.
Honesty is almost always the best policy.
When it comes to being direct honesty will cut the fat from the majority of your conversations. Sure you need to be sensitive to other people’s needs. Sometimes they are really not asking for your input, suggestions or critic {even if they think they are} they are looking for someone to listen and agree. You may not be able to agree, but listening and not talking can be part of direct communication too. And when it comes time for you to deliver what it is for you to say, do it without pomp or fluff, be clear and say it.
Stop, stop, STOP waffling on.
Oh my god, boring. SO boring. I am THE WORST at this. Sometimes I hear myself talking and think, holy heck Suger, wrap it up already. Be aware that if you are waffling on, the message of what you are trying to say is being lost in the volume of the words you are speaking. Stop talking, reset yourself and try again.
And that my friends are my sure-fire tips to being more direct in your communication. I hope they help you to say what there is to say when you need to say it. I know they’ve worked for me. Served me well actually. I feel like I could say more but like I said I’m prone to waffling on. Ha.
So tell me is there anything I missed? Do you communicate in a direct manner or are you a beat around the bush’er?
Hi! I’m Melissa Walker Horn. Around here, they call me Suger. I’m the Chief Blogger and doer of all the things here at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; I love a casual ootd, taking photos, and writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet over at Chalkboard Digital. You know, living the sweet life.
Trust me Sugar is the winner so far as Nice curves goes
Thanks Peter.
I usually listen too much and too blunt. People don’t like it when I am blunt. I have a habit after being thoughtful to say what is on my mind. People don’t really like that.
I think that’s part of it for me too. Direct and blunt can be different I guess, I often cross the line and just try hard to make amends quickly.
This is great! I’d love more though, on having difficult conversations. I’m a direct communicator most of the time but when it comes to difficult conversations, I find myself waffling, using lots of words to say very little and using convoluted words in defence against the discomfort being experience by myself or the other personal because the conversation is difficult (hard/scary/unpleasant) etc. Any tips for that kinda stuff? Don’t want much do I? Haha
Thanks Sheri! Your wish is my command lady, I’ve put a post in draft and will let you know when it goes live. x
Thanks heaps! You’re too good to me x
I am, I am. Haha.
I’m a direct person. At work anyways. I’m constantly marvelling at my colleagues waffling on on the phone to customers – I’m a get-in and get-out kind of conversationalist when it comes to my job 🙂
Good tips – using simple words is a good one too because assuming a level of knowledge (in a technical area anyways) can sometimes leave the other person too scared to admit they don’t know what you’re on about!
Yes and yes to that! A girl after my own heart on this one. I often used to be giving the team I worked with the wrap it up, the OMG PUT IT ON HOLD or the cut throat it’s over, hang up signals. All overly dramatic and essential to phone training, of course. Haha.
Great advice Melissa – I need to learn to listen more 🙂
Thank you Nat. Most of us could listen more.
Love is the only flower that GROWS and blossoms without the aid of seasons.Thanks for being the person you are so blessed.