Dear Unoriginal, Uninteresting Troll,

Firstly let me start by saying thank you for your email. It was unexpected to say the least. However I always appreciate correspondence from people that read this blog.
So yeah, thanks.
And now let me address certain aspects of your email I found particullarly unoriginal and dull, in the grand scheme of troll’ness.
You, of course, could be right. There may be no error on my blog for comments. I may be fishing for people to actually comment. Or, as you of wisely said, the problem may indeed be that I am boring and not worth the time to compose a response to the drivel that I write. {Though the presence of your email in my inbox says otherwise.}
You may also be correct when you say that I would need to pay people to follow this blog. Thanks, I was looking for a way to increase my readership and this could be perfect. Cash incentives. Rent-a-crowd! How much did you say you thought it would cost me? F’ing millions because this piece of sh!t blog takes some serious effort to get through. Hmmm. That may be out of my budget.
And thank you for saying that my personal blog has too much about me on it. My this and my that… Could I beeeee anymore selfish. My response to that? Well derrrrr.
Overall can I just say that when it comes to your trollie’ness you rate fairly low on the scale. I’ve seen some doozies. And you captain un-original are not one of them.
Retire. Give up now!
Oh, your still here? Great! Lastly thanks, for saying my profile pic is the ugliest thing you’ve ever seen. Nothing like a bit of constructive critisim… Hang on…. That wasn’t constructive..?!? AT ALL. Thank you for visiting my blog and kindly don’t come back if your so damn bored/disgusted/sickened by my appearance.
Wishing you everything you’ve got coming.
M.

15 responses to “Dear Unoriginal, Uninteresting Troll,”

  1. Wow. I can't believe people actually are this petty? You don't like what someone writes, don't visit!A blog is whatever you want it to be if it is a personal blog, wouldn't it um be personal?There are blogs I don't follow/comment/participate in because they do blatantly ask for followers & make it a condition of participating/entering giveaways. This pisses me off because frankly, it IS about content and not 'followers' or even 'comments' or 'unique users/page impressions'. Really if you have decent content it will stand up on its' own. The rest is fleeting.This is all so weird – Melissa I wouldn't have even dignified it with a response. You are better than that ;) xx

  2. Seriously? Someone posted that?I had one once telling me I was an appalling writer. Twas charming, no?I love your blog. Screw whoever that was.

  3. What a tool! Some people need to get a life. If they dont like what you blog about then why are they reading it? I LOVE your blog! If I was to stumble across a blog I didnt like I jsut wouldnt follow it and wouldnt read it. Keep doing what you are doing gorgeous because you have so mnay followers who enjoy your posts and love following you x

  4. No way? For real? How very sad some folks lives must be.I love your me me me me blog and lady, I love your style.Troll person: how about you get a life and use the UNFOLLOW button instead of being so classless…….. xx

  5. And I cant type tonight! Suppose I will get an email from the troll about that! LOL!

  6. OMG!! I CANNOT believe some people. Some people are so miserable, the only thing that makes them happy, is to try and make someone else miserable.

  7. Oh hun,Don't waste another minute responding to that rubbish.We love your blog and the burst of energy it gives us each day.SSG xxx

  8. *sigh* what is with people?? Who gets off on nasty trolling…?

  9. Are you serious????Someone emailed you with those awful awful things to say.Great response, how rude some people are.Lucky you know lots of us luv ya just the way you are. xxx

  10. Haters have some broken shards in their life that makes them haters. I am convinced of that. You can't worry too much about broken folks. Just be happy that you aren't in THEIR shoes! :D And let it roll off your back, no need to waste your lovely energy on garbage like that…

  11. Haha! I wish I was above a sarcastic and very tongue in cheek reply! But I'm not. Thanks for the support peoples. Down with Trollers I say.

  12. Haha – people like this are so sad, glad you took pity and gave a response as, let's face it, it was probably the only human interaction this little bland nothing had this month!Maybe we should start a pity party and invite all these nobodies, then at least they could see there ARE others like them. And they could all sit and vent their venom over a nice cuppa Chai, eh?Oh, and I have two irl people I'll let know…

  13. This troll sounds like they need to have the living snot beaten out of them. I know people in the blogging mafia. Let me make a call or two.

  14. Lost two followers since the troll… looks like the like it or lump it worked! :oD

  15. wow chick, missed this one. what an awful person. i like being 'not awful'. you are also 'not awful' which is one reason why i happily follow suger coat it. (and thanks for making me feel like i am not the only one – always helps doesn't it?)xx

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