A plot to take over New Zealand

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There is a danger, I think, in listening to too much talk back radio. At some stage the line between what is real and what is a whole bunch of made up crap blurs. And I think my tired {and kinda pissy, if we are honest} Hubby has been lead astray by the faceless {witless and brainless} listeners of rural talk back. 
And so, he hatched a plan.
A plan, I am worried to say he thought was a foolproof one. A sure fire hit. An inevitable conclusion. And it went along the lines of declaring the government at an end and merging it into the eighth {is THAT even correct!?} Australian state. A peaceful, act with no real losers. Virtually already there with the open residency rules etc. He claimed that NZ was already the eighth state. We just had to make it official. 
And of course everyone wants to be Aussies. Derr. It’s great here. 
And worst of all. He expects the Governor General Quentin Bryce {sp!? Gosh.} to carry out his dirty work dissolving the government. Protesting this as a forgone conclusion we inquired as to what her motives would be to do that..?! Well she would, if the prime minister was assassinated, surely. Isn’t that what would happen? I heard that on the radio or something…  
Oh holy crap. Stop talking. We screeched {we being me & my token kiwi friend Fi – haha, jokes} FBI and secret services are going to crash down our door and arrest you on conspiracy to murder a government official type person! Nah, he said. Bet they don’t. And honestly. Truly. I can’t tell you whether he was kidding or not. 
So I guess we’ll all just have to wait and see. So in conclusion, to summarise; the plan is to assassinate the prime minister and have the governor general dissolve the government and roll NZ into Australia. Oh yes. Why didn’t I THINK OF THAT…! Oh, that’s right, I don’t listen to talk back radio crazies. 

4 responses to “A plot to take over New Zealand”

  1. Hahahaha – alcohol always brings out the problem solver in all of us :) Talk back radio makes the problem solver a slightly unhinged, though :P

  2. You might want to be careful posting that on the http://www…. you wont be able to travel to NZ without being followed

  3. Trina's dead right: The New Zealand Secret Service (Jim, Ted and Jim) will be on to you!Plus Australia already has a New Zealand – Tasmania ;)

  4. I know Jim. not Jim, but Jim, Ted's brother in law actually – but that's not important. He alerted me to this post. Being that I am a secret agent from NZ living in Aus (one of eleventy billion), I had to check it out. I have called off the sheep dogs and calmed the Jims and Ted down. You are so lucky.

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