I used to care what other people wore, or how nice their hair is or where they got their shoes from. I used to argue my point of view until I was breathless and angry and upset and angry. Yes. Double angry. I was a fighter. I felt like my entire life was made up of defending myself, my ideas and demanding the world look like I do. Think like I do. Be like me. Luckily I got older and got over it. And my Mum said that I had to before I had no one left to fight with. Got over it, that was it.
You can be a stand for something without removing someone else’s right to believe what they believe. Sure, there are still things I think people have no right to believe but hey, that’s my right. It’s freeing the realisation that you don’t have to MAKE people do anything. I find I actually have more success now getting my point of view across then I ever did. My willingness to listen, to hear all sides and to enter the conversation makes what I have to say more valid, it seems. When I stopped fighting. Stopped shaming. Stop pushing and pulling. When I just was.
When there was nothing.
I was moderately serene.
There was space for people to listen to me. And me to them.
I got old. I think.
I got zen.
Now I’m a lover, not a fighter and I’m much happier for it!
Hi! I’m Suger; Chief Blogger at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; love a casual ootd, taking photos + writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet; photos, create content, write copy and devise social media plans for personal brands, small businesses and bloggers. You know, living the sweet life.
I kind of needed to read this right now. Thanks <3
You’re welcome. Hope it helped.
A big YES! ;]
Thank you. xo
My wife and I have a great saying now, and it makes life so much better, if we can’t see the others point of view on something, after a while one of us will say ” I beg to differ!” and that’s like, all done and move on.
I beg to differ indeed. Such a great idea.
Can tots relate to this !
Uh huh. Thanks. xo
For me the ability to an issue or problem from all angles is a sign of wisdom. Also the art of disagreeing respectfully is severely under rated, particularly online. Hope you are having a great fathers day with your hubby. Love
Mumabulous
I absolutely agree.
Thank you lovely. We had a day. For sure.
Maybe you just became more like me?
You know I’ve always been a lover not a fighter but also happy to listen before speaking…?
You don’t always have to blame/praise age…
Well yes dear brother, this may be true too. You’ve always been more this than I ever was. Perhaps I learnt to embrace my inner Dean Boy.
I’ve always said ‘agree to disagree’. I don’t feel the need to MAKE someone agree with my point of view or opinion, but I do expect them to respect my right to it as I do them. I get very frustrated by people who think there is only right or wrong. There are too many different factors influencing a person or situation at any one time for things to be so cut and dried. Glad you found a calmer middle ground 🙂
Me too, absolutely me too. Wise words Miss Sheri, thank you for contributing. xo
I had this epiphany a little while ago and I feel so much happier now. Welcome to the other side Melissa!!
Thank you! Loving it here. Nice.