I used to care what other people wore, or how nice their hair is or where they got their shoes from. I used to argue my point of view until I was breathless and angry and upset and angry. Yes. Double angry. I was a fighter. I felt like my entire life was made up of defending myself, my ideas and demanding the world look like I do. Think like I do. Be like me. Luckily I got older and got over it. And my Mum said that I had to before I had no one left to fight with. Got over it, that was it.
You can be a stand for something without removing someone else’s right to believe what they believe. Sure, there are still things I think people have no right to believe but hey, that’s my right. It’s freeing the realisation that you don’t have to MAKE people do anything. I find I actually have more success now getting my point of view across then I ever did. My willingness to listen, to hear all sides and to enter the conversation makes what I have to say more valid, it seems. When I stopped fighting. Stopped shaming. Stop pushing and pulling. When I just was.
When there was nothing.
I was moderately serene.
There was space for people to listen to me. And me to them.
I got old. I think.
I got zen.
Now I’m a lover, not a fighter and I’m much happier for it!
Hi! I’m Melissa Walker Horn. Around here, they call me Suger. I’m the Chief Blogger and doer of all the things here at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; I love a casual ootd, taking photos, and writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet over at Chalkboard Digital. You know, living the sweet life.