Suger’s Rules for Hubby Harassing

by | Suger's Blog | 5 comments

Doesn’t Hubby look impressed! 

Spray tan yourself orange and wait for him to notice. When he does say it’s just a little tan. Then watch his face. It’ll be worth the days of exfoliating. Promise.

Just when you are about to leave the house together, the car is started and the garage door is up. Now is the chance, get out of the car {or make a move to} and say, I’m just going to change my outfit. And watch his face closely for the reaction.

Serve grilled fish and vegetables for dinner every night for a week. Even the politest Hubby will cave and complain about the meal. You might too, FYI. Grilled fish. Seriously!!

Wait until Hubby is sleeping, then sneak in to bed. Lay there a while until you are sure he’s back to sleep {or, you know, STILL sleeping}. Then gently poke him in the side of the face. When he wakes or bats your hand away. Complain that he woke you up.

Buy him clothes in ridiculously un-manly shade, pattern or stripe and insist he wear them to the pub. He doesn’t actually have to wear it. But the ‘making’ him wear it part will be funny as. Just keep an eye on his face, the eyes in particular. The inner struggle of self preservation and wife pleasing. Comedy gold.

There you go. Goodness knows how I’ve stayed married all these years. Haha. Sorry Hubby. I only annoy you because I love you. If I didn’t. I wouldn’t bother. Promise.  šŸ˜‰

5 Comments

  1. Natalie
    Natalie on September 30, 2011 at 11:07 PM

    Dude totally explains why I am still single. I will totally follow these rules when I get my next boyfriend

    Reply
  2. Sydney Shop Girl
    Sydney Shop Girl on October 1, 2011 at 12:39 AM

    Bwa ha ha!!!!!!!I can vouch for every single one of these, Melissa.At least you don't make off with the doona in the middle of winter like I do.SSG xxx

    Reply
  3. River
    River on October 1, 2011 at 11:26 AM

    Well now I know why my marriages failed. I didn't do any of these things.

    Reply
  4. My Beautiful World
    My Beautiful World on October 1, 2011 at 4:14 PM

    Oh my friend what have I been doing…30 years of marriage and never tried on of these, Iā€™m now on a mission to try some if I can stop laughing!!Great postAlways Wendy

    Reply
  5. Karen
    Karen on October 2, 2011 at 8:18 PM

    Bwahaha. Brilliant.But maybe I should spare a future boyfriend until we're married…

    Reply

Let's talk about that;

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.