It’s a bit of a catchphrase, investing in yourself, but it’s one of those things that below the wank factor is true. Sure it’s been misused and flog to death, but hang in there with me, because I’m right, it’s true. Investing in yourself is ESSENTIAL for being happy.
And, it’s something that all too easily gets put aside, pushed to the bottom of the list and disregarded. By women especially. It’s not our fault, they trained us to be this way. Told us to be nice girls, to look after everyone else, to put the needs of our partner, our family, our kids before our own. It’s not your fault. Insert sigh of relief.
That is until you know better, then it’s up to you to do better. Whoops. Excuse over. Maya Angelou said some version of that, from memory. Consider this me telling you there is another way of existing, a way of being that doesn’t relegate you to the outer reaches of selfish-town if you invest in yourself. No, do better.
If you’re ready to do that for yourself, read on. And if not, well my friend, I am sorry to hear that because you deserve every single bit of what I’m about to tell you to go and get for yourself. You deserve space and time and self-love. You need to realise that they lied to you and they did it for their own gain. Not yours.
Investing in yourself can come in a multitude of different ways. It can be the woman who returns to study after children her children go to school to upskill into a job she dreams of. The time out with the door locked in the bathroom to read your favourite magazine. Taking on that new course to challenge and excite yourself. Starting your own business. Or closing one that isn’t working. Maybe it’s the time you spend in the gym getting your head and your heart in order.
For you, for me, for each of us investing in yourself will be different.
Let me tell you about me. Because I’m the best example I have of why this is important and why you should do it for yourself, right? There have been a few occasions recently that I have been presented with decisions to make about my blog businesses (yes, plural). Decisions that meant sometimes sizeable investments from me and decisions to be made on the spot. They were a fork in the road type moments that left me exhausted, sick, overwhelmed and generally questioning everything I’d welcomed into my life even days before.
Baby-sitting, too much. Making my appointments for work, impossible, reschedule. Spending quality time with my husband, nope. Investing in my friends, HA. Everything that I love to do and that I have built my life entirely around was on the cutting board. I was afraid, I know that now looking back, but at the time I felt like maybe it was all too much. It was an everything must go moment for the singular purpose of being able to breathe again. I wanted the feeling that the commitments I’d made were bigger than I was to end.
Decisions to make.
Overwhelm in my head.
Lots to do and no space to do it.
Panic building and urge to forget everything at a fever pitch.
And at that moment, with my palms itching to be thrown in the air and declare my surrender, I chose another path. I chose to invest in myself as I have never done before. Bigger and more determined to have everything I want in my life, I confirmed myself into a retreat to focus solely on my businesses. I took a week off work, deciding I would figure out a way to pay my bills later. And I said yes over and over again to things I love to do, no to things I didn’t.
Wine, yes. Cheese, yes. Beach, yes. Hanging with my family, yes. Reading that book on my bedside since 1901, yup. Cleaning, nope. Telling spam emailers to bugger off, nope, delete. Time spent bitching, complaining and generally having a whinge, no way. And piece by piece I cleared the space for myself and poured the investment in through learning, quiet time to think and filling up my cup.
Let me tell you from the other side, it was magical. You wouldn’t believe the things that have come my way since I did that. The offers, the opportunities, SPACE. And yes a lot of it is still in the vague-blog arena of things, but it reaffirmed for me that when all else fails I need to step back, get focused on myself and what I want out of this ONE LIFE that I have been given.
And I thought to myself, atop this floaty mountain of wonderment, that YOU need to know that for yourself. You need to know that if you take the time to find something you love, a way to invest in the development of you, that you should do it. You should get all sorts of creative about how to make that work and go for it. Invest in yourself, and here’s the real kicker, everyone else around you benefits. You couldn’t stop that happening if you tried.
Now out you go, identify one thing that would qualify as an investment in YOU and start hatching a plan to make it work. As a reminder, I made you a PDF that can be printed, shared, waved about like a flag, or stuck on the back of your bathroom door to haunt you every single day about this investing in yourself business.
Because it’s important. Because YOU are important. Full, freaking, stop.
Click the image to download (it’ll pop out a new window).
Invest in yourself Team. Suger, over and out.
If you are ready to jump in and commit yourself to something just for you, leave it in the comments. I can’t wait to get behind you and cheer you on. x
Hi! I’m Melissa Walker Horn. Around here, they call me Suger. I’m the Chief Blogger and doer of all the things here at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; I love a casual ootd, taking photos, and writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet over at Chalkboard Digital. You know, living the sweet life.
Great advice. It’s a bit like the oxygen mask on the plane, always fix yourself up before you help others. Investing in, and taking care of ourselves is so important, and let’s face it, we’re totally worth it! Love the printable btw!
Thank you Sammie. Enjoy. And yes, I think you have to be looking out for yourself if you want to care for others. And not just because burn out sucks, but because, like you said, we matter!
Such a lovely message! It’s always a good reminder to take care of ourselves, because somehow it’s so easy to put ourselves last in the busy worlds we live in. As a part of National Novel Writing Month, I’ve been setting aside time to write every day and it feels wonderful!
That sounds perfect Robyn. I imagine myself in a future life waking with the sun, writing before wandering down the beach for a swim and returning to a sumptuous breakfast of eggs and fresh fruit etc. Wait. I got distracted day dreaming, lol, what were we talking about? Haha. Yes, taking time out for you is so important.
Love your guts!!! It’s amazing how much more space for good things can be made by getting rid of the “crap” – emotional and mental!
Thanks Grace. And it’s true. Clear the space and all sorts of things show up!
Love this! A week away to focus on something you love sounds awesome. Going to look into doing that! Jayde and Lynda (Incited Inc.)
It was amazing! Just what the Dr ordered. Perfection. I hope you find something like that that works for you.
I have needed a wake up call on this a few times through out the year but I have been trying hard to teach myself that it is ok to look after me and to focus on me even. Practice makes perfect right.
That it does. Practice, practice, practice. And some reminders always help.
What a great read! You have inspired me.
Thank you Chantelle! I’m so glad. x