There’s this feeling you get when you finish a great workout with people you enjoy spending time with and the afternoon is bathed in this delicious warm light. It’s pretty special. It’s sort of tingly exhaustion that takes over your whole body. And yesterday, after much laughing and exercising, I had that feeling. I think it’s that feeling I crave more than the feel of muscle and strength in my body. The calm, clear, focused dreaminess.
I’d been to the pool first. Head down, blowing bubbles as I powered through my laps. Stopping occasionally to chat and swap news with a woman I’ve known since we were 12 years old. An old friend I’m growing old with. I complain about committing to doing Step that afternoon with a laugh and a sigh. The sun turns our noses a little pink before we decide to call it a day and hop out.
After a quick change, racking a brush through my wiry hair {no cap, I’m attempting to undo the chocolate-brown auburn I accidentally dyed my hair} and I was on my way to the gym. My sister’s friend {mine too these days I think} Jaz runs the Step class on Mondays and we like to go and support her when we can. And by we I mean my sister, my cousin, her friend, sister-in-law and her friend {who was returning first week back!}. We meet in the room and take up residence in a perfect triangle between the fans and air-con.
It’s a nervous time for me. Some days I feel like I show up at these classes and it’s the stupidest thing I could be doing. I look around and I feel so different. I start to worry I won’t keep up, that I’ll hurt myself or face plant on a step in front of everyone breaking my face. I am reminded of why I didn’t do things like this for so long. I was afraid to be sweaty and puffed in public. I was afraid of being uncoordinated and goofy.
It’s another feeling you get. I get. But you know what. It’s a lie. I’ve seen people stack it. I’ve seen women of all shapes and sizes sweat and work and huff and puff in these classes. No one notices for long. It barely registers. You see you’re too busy working your butt off to care. and later, when you’ve laughed and joked {that could just be me} through an entire class and your face is red {or white, Amanda Claire!} and you walk back through the gym you feel good.
Powerful!
You know what, powerful is a feeling I get and I LIKE it. As a girl you are told to be beautiful, soft, gentle, kind, caring… Then sexy and confident, demure and whatever else. No one ever tells girls to feel POWERFUL. Go out with an intention to be powerful, young one, said no one ever. And what a shame that is. My parents were great role models for me, my Mum in particular was the best. She didn’t need to say be powerful, independent and strong. She led the way in her role as my mother, as a wife, as a business owner and successful entrepreneur. She just was powerful.
So go find something to do every day that makes you feel great. Feel powerful. Feel strong and alive and supple and proud. Bask in the awesomeness that is your best self. Take control of your life, stop making excuses and grab life firmly by the you-know-whats. That’s my hot tip. Maybe that’s the whole point of this post which if I’m honest looks nothing like it first did when I sat down to write it. But you know what, I’m okay with that.
Are you picking up what I’m putting down on this one?
Hi! I’m Melissa Walker Horn. Around here, they call me Suger. I’m the Chief Blogger and doer of all the things here at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; I love a casual ootd, taking photos, and writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet over at Chalkboard Digital. You know, living the sweet life.
Yup.powerful is not encouraged but should be. Melissa thanks for the thoughtful discussion
You’re so welcome. Thanks Martina.
I’m on your page melissa, I dig that feeling! I love that its me that makes me feel that way. Its me that has to hop, skip, jump, push, pull and squat my way into it .I get that feeling from taking time for me for things that are important to my health, my body, and my mind 🙂
Yeeeeeesssss! Love this. Me too.