So here we are, over half way. And maybe you’re feeling it, maybe you aren’t. But at this stage it becomes important to FAKE IT. We are going to trick your brain into thinking YOU are the most confident person I the wooooooorld! And truth be told, I would say that most of the confident people you know still use these tricks to make them appear confident when confidence escapes them.
Here are my top five fake it until you make it tips;
- Ask people questions about themselves – It takes the pressure of you speaking, gives you a chance to catch your breath in the conversation and it is fun to know stuff about people.
- Stand up straight, sit up straight and for goodness sake stop slouching! You know why. Posture and body language convey SO much. So even if you don’t feel it, force your body to look like a confident person. You may not fool the experts but most people will fall for it every time.
- Stop fidgeting – Similar to the point above, fidgeting shows the world the nervous energy. Put your hands in your pocket or ball them into fists. Stand firmly on both feet to avoid toe tapping or shuffling on the spot. Once you’re aware of it, you’ll spot how often you fidget. I know I do. LOTS.
- Take deep breaths – If you are starting to panic, if you feel your heart beating and the colour draining from your face take a deep breath in. Take as many as you need to get yourself feeling better. Lots of fresh air will do you good too.
- Find a distraction – If you start to hear the chatter in your head above all else, go and pour yourself a glass of water, or hang up your coat, or do anything to keep your mind busy on other things while you pull it together a bit.
I use a lot of these tips myself. No matter how confident you feel, sometimes when you go somewhere or are about to do something, you just feel terrible! I have one other tip I left off the list and it is probably my favourite. It’s not for the faint-hearted so accept the challenge if you dare. Ha!
Insert jaws style music here. Or that violin bit from Psycho.
No really, it’s fine. I simply confess that I’m nervous to anyone who will listen. Yup, that’s it. If I own it, it goes away. I just say, gosh I’m a bit nervous. People are happy to reveal that they’re a bit nervous too, or they step in to make YOU feel better. Win/Win. The funny part is for all the faking it this is the most honest you can be. To reveal yourself to people, that takes real confidence. Try it sometime, try it today!
Daily Challenge: Practice some of the tips today when you don’t feel it.
Hi! I’m Melissa Walker Horn. Around here, they call me Suger. I’m the Chief Blogger and doer of all the things here at Suger Coat It. Blogging since 1901; I love a casual ootd, taking photos, and writing about things that irk or inspire me. I love wine and cheese, long days at the beach and spending time with my family. I make stuff for the internet over at Chalkboard Digital. You know, living the sweet life.
Now I know I am one of those people who is massively guilty to standing with their arms folded.
I know this is closed body language, but it’s just who I bloody well am! I think it’s my slight way of putting a barrier up, but then I do it around my friends and family all the time. I also tend to fidget more around people I’m comfortable with. Like it the way of looking down and playing on my phone. It’s the blogger in me!
It’s not who you are lady, it’s a habit you’ve picked up. You wouldn’t say Hi Suger, I’m Miss Pink, I have blonde hair, am a skinny bitch and cross my arms across my chest in public. 😛 Seriously, try dropping your arms, even for a while and see how you go. That’s my personal challenge to you, forget the rest.
Bloody bloggers, I adore them and their nerd’esque behaviour. 🙂
I have and still do employ some of these tactics. But you’re right fessing up your nervous in a situations is so freeing. I haven’t fallen flat on my face yet.
Me too! Absolutely. Sometimes it takes a while to find your feet. I knew it worked for more people than just me. YAY.
“To reveal yourself to people, that takes real confidence” SO true! I do this often and then wonder if it was the right thing to do, thanks for the reminder!
You’re welcome. It is. If they decide you’re not for them, they’ve made the choice on the real you and it was never going to be a good fit. That’s what I think anyway.
excellent as always xx
Thank you Nicole.
Hi,
Lol..Lurrrve your humour : )
Interesting post, takes me back to 15 yrs of age when my world was my oyster & my parents had such high hopes for me..What happened??
Thank you. Oh I hear you on that one. But I’m sure they are proud as punch. xo