Sponsored by bride.com.au 

When bride.com.au approached me about doing a post for them I thought maybe they had missed the boat. My wedding was over 8 years ago now after all. You know, before Pinterest. I’m not really in the market for wedding dresses and bridal type items. But then I was like, hold on, I know LOTS of brides. Friends, family and friends of friends… I can go all Aunty Suger on this and offer some advice from an ancient bride to a soon-to-be one. So I said yes and here we are.

Five tips for brides-to-be so you don’t lose your freaking mind. 

plus size bride winter wedding-7

Go easy on people, your wedding is super important, top of the list, the most amazing thing in the world. For you. Not everyone is going to feel the same way. Sure they’ll be excited to come, to celebrate and see what the bride is wearing but that’s about as far as it goes. Some of the biggest arguments to come out of wedding plan can be the I can’t believe you forgot/you don’t care/put in some effort argument. It’s horrible and later {for the most part} you’ll feel like a tossa for making such a big about it.

Don’t be upset if friends can’t remember the exact date of your wedding three years out or how many bridesmaids you’re having… Think of weddings you have attended in the past, did that stuff matter to you? Until the week or two before it probably didn’t matter that much at all to them. That’s not about you and how much they love you. It’s about life, being busy and people having other stuff going on.

Have a clear idea of what you want to spend and what YOU ARE spending. It’s time to get your best spreadsheet skills out. Weddings can add up. You add some gift bags here and there, flowers for sprinkling, confetti {or rice, whatevs} and bit by bit it adds up. To this day I am still terrified to work out what we spent on our wedding. There are lots of things that will pop up along the way that you will think you can’t live without. For future reference, that’s probably not true. Stay calm and stick to your budget.

Budgeting is important and so it staying on track. Try a notebook to scribble down amounts or staple invoices/receipts in to. It might just help you decide between the five tier buttercream wedding cake or the slightly more modest version. Did I tell you we forget to serve our guests wedding cake? We totally did. Hello three tiers of caramel & white chocolate mud-cake just for us. Winning.

plus size bride winter wedding-4

plus size bride winter wedding-5

plus size bride winter wedding-6

It’s never going to be perfect, so stop freaking out. There are plenty of wedding dresses magazine’s out there with lots of perfectly styled, wonderfully weddings. And yes they are fun to look at and pinch details from. But what you don’t see if the hung over groomsman in the car {Hi John!} or the paper bag lanterns catching on fire {that totally happened to me}, amongst other things. The reality is that when it comes down to it there is no perfect wedding, but you may just find it was perfect for you.

You’ll probably cry, laugh until you snort, tell someone off or all of the above during the wedding planning process. Yes, thanks for asking, you have become Bridezilla. We all say it’s not going to happen to us. But for me my moment came when I sat on my parents kitchen bench in floods of tears complaining they weren’t interested enough in MY BIG DAY. Or actually maybe it was when the florist told me they could get white cabbage roses but they had lots of carnations on the Thursday before my wedding and I SCREAMED at her.

Whatever it is, chances are if you are planning the wedding yourself, paying for at least some of it, have an idea of what you want that is pretty specific or people around you with their own lives you will crack it at least once. Other people will nod and smile and say you were fiiiiine. But they are lying. Wait until 5 years down the track when it becomes the butt of family jokes. Then you know.

My advice on this part, I guess, is to get that you may be a bit unreasonable sometimes. Try not to give yourself too much rope. The last thing you want is a lifelong bust-up with your bestie over bridesmaid dresses. It’s not worth it. Take a deep breath, do something to de-stress and check the attitude lady. You know, if you can.

And finally, don’t listen to former brides when they give advice. If it makes you feel bad, question things you love or make you feel like they are competing with you. There are a lot of people with a lot of input out there so choose when to listen and when to ignore. This day is about you and your partner, celebrating your love, the commitment you’re making and inviting the people in your life to share in that. Keep that top of mind and you’ll be fine.

plus size bride winter wedding-2

So there you go folks. My top tips for surviving wedding planning if you are anything like me. Sure there are people who cruise through effortlessly, but I haven’t met them. Some make it look easier than others. I personally chose the champagne route and was in a sparkly bubble haze most of the time. It’s tricky business, be kind to yourself, the people around you and try to have SOME fun. It’ll be over in a moment and you’ll be wishing you could have your time again.

Got any tips for our future brides? Put your Aunty Suger hat on and share them below. Or better yet, share your wedding disaster story. They are THE BEST.