suger coat it blog-54

I don’t ask for much. Not really. Just a life of my own making, filled with opportunities like yesterday. Afternoon sun bathing my skin I sit and watch the trees in my backyard shake their leaves gently in the wind. Green and gold, brown and yellow. Imagining what it would be like to see those trees drop their leaves, wondering just how cold that it would need to get.

My house, even without sufficient light in the living area most of the time, is a place I love to be. A perfect haven to come home to. A home that we built. Sort of literally thanks to a builders help. MY house has been filled with people and been empty. The space has seemed much too big for just us two. Then overflowed, splitting at the seams with love and people when we’ve asked it too.

It’s my home. But the most valuable thing here is my relationship and what we have managed to create together. This life, this abundance of great and wonderful things. It lives here but it could live wherever. I wonder about that as I ponder our current situation, work for Hubby has been slow, our savings are drying up. Will we leave here by choice to lighten the load?

Probably not. It only feels that dire now. Work like ours ebbs and flows, it’s the downside of being self-employed in a small, smaaaall business. The brain bending part of it that I can’t ignore is that every time there are good time, fast times, times to build the savings I always think, naaaah, the hard times are over. Thank goodness Hubby doesn’t listen to me.

I was thinking maybe I should do a 30 day challenge to raise some funds, then blog it. I’ve been looking for some inspiration and combined with the obsession for Two Broke Girls, I can see myself with a cute counter tally on the sidebar ticking up and down. How much could a person raise in 30 days, do you think? Hmmmm, curious.

And in that thinking, in the moment of the idea planting in my head I realise that I’m okay. We are okay. Life is good and times really aren’t that tough {it’s all relative, right?} and as long as I have an idea in my head then there is hope. It’s that idea, the thought of what else is possible, the chance to create something from nothing. The chance to clear the space and move forward.

A chance to create.