Boys, boys, boys. Love you Kel but tell me it’s my job to cook you dinner and I’ll kick your bum. 

I don’t get this celebration of men carrying out household chores. I also don’t get who sat down, after the 50’s and decided men’s jobs, women’s jobs. Before you lynch me saying I have no grip on reality hang in there. You can say it to the end. I was born in the eighties. I didn’t have to fight for a number of rights that the women before me did. I especially didn’t have to fight for them in my own house. 

Let me tell you about me. I was raised by working {out of the home, business owner} parents. Plural. They had some assistance three days a week. I was raised on 400 acres. I had cousins just down the road from me. We rode the bus to school and to sporting commitments on Saturdays. I was independent. I am the eldest child. My father always cooked dinner and Mum did the dishes. And sometimes they switched. Whoever was home would often start the washing machine. My mother would do the ironing and sorting.

And it all just kind of worked. Piece by piece. Job by job. Child by child. 

My point is that there ARE NO RULES unless you say there are. And unless we each set the rules for our relationships, interactions and yes, even our houses, the boundaries, in a way that suits us then we have no one to blame but ourselves. While we celebrate our partners, fathers and sons making a contribution to household chores like the second coming has come, we continue to relegate these tasks as women’s work. 
Probably a simplistic view. And doubtful that it will necessarily be popular. I know that working from or for the home may cause this to be different. But I don’t put that down to gender. I think it’s more job description. Yup. I totally said that out loud. I’m cringing on the inside here.

Go on. Tell me what you think, what’s your opinion!? 

   

  • Megan Leslianne

    "While we celebrate our partners, fathers and sons making a contribution to household chores like the second coming has come, we continue to relegate these tasks as women's work."Wow. That's the best and most succinct way I've ever seen it written. Perfect.

  • I completely agree! I blogged about a similar topic. I am a stay at home mum but that is my choice – not made just because I'm the one with the uterus! excellent post xx

  • when I married there still were very traditional roles. I mean there were very traditional expectations! some were a good fit and some were not. so our own set of rules evolved. I love the way it turned out . I didn't love everything all along the way . somethings never change and somethings do. it's always up to you .

  • I agree. Although since I don't work right now I do most of the household chores, but that's just a matter of my being more available. My son helps out with "girly" jobs and he's not celebrated. I say "thank you" when either of them do anything that I normally do. But they thank me continually for clean clothes, dinner, etc. I think you're right…there aren't women jobs, and men jobs. There are just jobs. And everyone must pitch it to get things done.floridagirlinoklahoma.blogspot.com

  • There is so much truth to this and this was very well said. That is exactly why I had my wife make up a list of rules for me to follow and why that list now includes remembering to shower for obvious reasons.

  • I agree! And I was raised in a very similar environment. I was taught from a young age how to be independent and take care of myself. My DH & I share the responsibilities and make sure it is fair. Currently I'm not working so I take care of most of the cleaning and cooking but he is earning the dollars. We like to keep things fair in our house.

  • Nicely put. In the early days of our relationship things like cooking and cleaning were half half. Now I do most of it but only because I'm home earlier. If Oh has a day off during the week he'll do some and I thank him but dont make a big deal of it.In our house it's not about mens and womens work, it's who's in the best position to do it at the time.

  • I'm lucky enough to have a fiance who had a great mum who taught him how to cook and do his own laundry, and who then lived on his own on a property in the middle of nowhere where he had no choice BUT to do everything for himself. Consequently, we share all the duties around here. Granted i do most of the cooking – but thats because i enjoy it and the rule is one person cooks, the other does the dishes. I clean the bathroom – but he mows the lawn and washes the car.The washing, hanging out and folding of laundry is who ever gets to it first!

  • Cook for me and I'll have your baby. Avocado on toast will have me purring like a kitten, and if a guy will do that for me… ahem. Then it's on. Hahaha!! But seriously. xoxoxoxo

  • Guv lived by himself for 10years before i came along and so he IS capable of looking after himself and proved so when i went to england last year.HOWEVER i am more than happy to do most of the household tasks at home because while yes we both work, i only do so part-time and so have more free time to do the household stuff – he earns more than me, puts a roof over our heads and works damn long hours [with bucketloads of stress thrown in] to provide the life we lead.though i do agree with everything you wrote and if i worked fulltime, I'd expect Guv to pull his weight ALOT more and KNOW that he would without having to be asked to, everything would be split 50/50.~x~

  • River

    I always did the dishes, cooking and laundry because I actually enjoy those things. Everything else *kind of* got shared, which means he'd say "I'll do them", then when I gave up waiting, I did them.