I received an email this week, an email from a {lovely, charming, gorgeous} reader who was concerned for us all. Us being Bloggers. There was a fight raging and she wondering where to from here. What would happen to us all. And bit by bit the week revealed itself and people’s real commitments did too. This is not a post to comment on anything that happened. Nor a post that implies that anyone HAS lost their mind. This is a post to stop us all from dropping off the edge into a swirling, whirl of oblivion and our own egos. Me included. So take it or leave it as always. But here’s what I think it takes to keep sane when a bit percentage of your life is spent online.

Assume people mean well. Unless they prove otherwise. Then block or bar as necassary and shut the door.

Take plenty of time out to squish your toes in the grass, smoosh your face into those you love and sniff the roses.

Be kind above all else, be kind. To yourself mostly. Then others too.

On your blog, do what makes you happy. It’s the only point. Full stop.

If there is a comment that makes you angry, don’t reply. Maybe ever. But for a while at least. Cool off.

Remember you are an online publisher, not a teenage girl. Would you still stand by that tomorrow?

Be brave.

Be smart.

Be yourself. 

Be ONLY yourself.

Find people who inspire you. Stop reading those that pull you down.

Enjoy it, or stop doing it {that bit of advice always slips in there somewhere!}

And never, ever forget that there are some things you just can’t take back. Or un-see for that matter.

What’s your tip for staying sane in blog world?

  • I have no idea what happened! Where was I?

    But great tips. xxx

    • I’m with you Telle, we miss out on all the goss!

      My tip: never take yourself too seriously.

    • Enjoying your family and the gorgeous area you live in? 😉
      Thanks!

  • Kate @ Our Little Sins

    I’m not really that au fait with the happenings either but I find if something’s bothering me I turn off my computer and organise catch-ups with friends I had before blogging (I’m always so tempted to write IRL friends but so many blogger friends are IRL friends now too!!). My friends from pre-blogging don’t even know my blog exists so it gives me great perspective.

    Your tips are great!

    • Thanks Kate. I find the same, often Hubby and I will take a drive or I just turn off everything and go out to dinner. It certainly helps.

  • mumabulous

    I’ve seen a few references to an online stoush within the Australian blogging scene but I’ve no idea what actually happened. Anyways as the great Mrs Woog says – blogging is meant to be fun. If it stops being fun then it is time to take a step back.

    • I don’t know enough myself to comment. But a stoush it was. And that Mrs Woogs person is awesome! She knows her stuff.

  • True, true and true. I think a lot could be different if people stood back for a second/minute/hour – whatever it takes before responding or posting! Wish I could un-see a few things

    • It certainly does help to give it some space sometimes. Absolutely.
      YouTube is the WORST for unseeing things. Haha.

  • Great message Suger!
    🙂
    xx

  • Jackie Brown

    Good post – have an awesome weekend 🙂

  • Lisa Barton-Collins

    Excellent advice, words to live by! When I attended the Hello Bloggers Workshop you said something that has stuck with me ever since – ‘make yourself proud’. I’ve been just gobsmacked watching this whole catfight, I don’t think anyone is making themselves, or anyone else, proud.
    xx

    • That’s my favourite saying ever. I have it plastered everywhere. Words to live by indeed.

  • Well said Melissa!

  • Again I’ve missed what has happened, all I know is that some fellow bloggers i know, have been witness to it and it’s disturbing them. I’m thankful to those for not perpetuating the situation by spilling the beans about it. Negative attracts negative, like attracts like.

    As always Hun, you share sage advice.

    • The email I received asked if maybe I had words to share, it turns out, I did. I think it caused a lot of people to step back a little and questions their motives and other peoples. Further conversation gives the issue more air to breathe.

  • spicing it up and having a change.. if your in a rut with blogging.. do something.. change it.. I did and its made me SO much happier! 🙂

    • Such a great tip. Chantelle had a post on her blog a while ago about writing interesting stuff or living a life that is interesting enough to write about. This is that exactly.

  • Great post! I was so disappointed to watch it all unfold, really disappointed. Two grown women that should know better and should have never let it unfold and escalate to the point that it did. I’m glad that they eventually resolved it amicably, but it all should have been done in private and not for their readers to see. Pretty sure that they have both lost readers because of it. I’d hazard a guess to say that they wouldn’t be proud of the words or actions. As a Mother of a teenager this is exactly the type of behaviour I watch for in my son’s online world, it’s called ‘delete and block’. I hope that they can both take something positive away from it and learn that this behaviour is NOT acceptable, ever.

    • I think we can all get caught up in what it feels like online sometimes. I don’t envy them for what is a difficult and very public happening. I doubt very much that you would see either of these ladies involved in something like this again.

  • Whiningattheworld

    Great post, Suger.

  • Gayel @ Modern Mummy Mayhem

    Great advice Suger as always. To be a good blogger dont you think you need a great BIG life in the real world?

    I watched it all unfold and felt sick. It literally ruined my evening. So delete I did. My rule is, it must bring me joy, happiness and positivity or goodbye. I am sorry for the people involved but I guess I am selfish like that..I protect my happy at all cost and won’t waste my time on negative.

    • I think you need to be living a life worth writing about, absolutely. Chantelle says that. I love that.

      I’m glad I missed it first hand. And from what people have told me, you weren’t the only one. Such a sad situation. Terrible. But yes, always, protect YOURSELF. Your happy. i never, ever, make apologies for that. I’m brutal when it comes to that.

  • river

    Great advice. My tips are the same. If something makes you angry, walk away. Cool off.
    There is no point losing your cool over something said by someone you’ve never met.
    NO point at all.

  • I love this post Melissa. Excellent, excellent advice. Rachel x

  • Kirsty @ My Home Truths

    I read some of what went on and unfortunately I don’t think anyone involved came out well. I generally ignore these things and I live by the rule if I can’t say anything nice I won’t say anything at all. Life is too short and too important to get caught up in conflict – blogging is supposed to be fun after all. It’s my hobby anyway and when it no longer seems fun I take a break for a while until I’m ready to come back again. Great post Melissa, spot on as always!

  • Melissa Mitchell

    I’m not sure really how to reply here as I was in a way involved (my blog is small, so mostly off radar). But I do love this post, despite that. And FYI, that is maybe my favourite photo of you ever. xxxx

    • I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Sorry to hear that you too were involved. Tough for everyone.
      Thank you. A photo from this set is my current fb profile pic. Love them.

  • Allison Tait

    Great post Melissa. Lots of good advice there.

  • Cassandra (@ LittleOliverJ)

    I just found your blog, I love it. Good advice, I look forward to lurking through your archive!

  • yes. all of the above. always.

  • ALLTHINGSJENNIFER

    YES!