Sometimes I sit in cafes and write. The noise of the people and the rush of the crowd lull me into a quiet in my head that gets me focused on what is real for me. The bottom of the barrel of me. The reality, the truth. I explore how I really feel and what I really think. I consider who I am and what I really want. I admire and admonish my choices. In the noise and with people I can be honest.

Being alone and honest is too difficult.

When I am alone I can convince myself that your opinion doesn’t matter. But it does. When I’m alone I tell myself I am always kind, first on the scene to make a difference, that I will do what’s required for whoever, whenever. With people, I’m a little more selective. Judgmental and choosy. When I am alone I can say what I want and be that. With people, who really am is there.

Loud and clear.

I watch people arrive and leave. People watching is my favourite thing. I watch as some confidently appear and disappear. Some pull at their clothes. Some only look up when necessary, never meeting the eye of those around them. Others pout and stare down others in the line. Demanding a reaction in their pre-caffeine funk. I wonder if they’re more honest in a crowd? Do they play nice but who they really are is angry? Do they look comfortable in their skin because they are? No matter what they say, actions speak louder than words.

Especially in a crowd.

  • Gayel

    Wow…so very true. Actions and eyes I think speak so much more than any words ever will. Great post..have a lovely Sunday Suger!

  • Lisa barton-Collins

    I love people watching, it’s one of my most favourite things ever.
    Although I think actions do indeed speak louder than words I don’t always think everyone’s actions are a true representative of thier inner self, for a thousand different reasons. Not everyone is free to be and act as their inner voice dictates. It’s easy to examine your inner self in a crowd because you have a frame of reference, so to speak – a feeling of interconectedness as a human. But that frame of reference is peoples outer faces, not their inner ones.
    Am I making sense? It’s early, I’ve only had one coffee 🙂

    • You are. Turns out one coffee does the trick. 😉
      The frame of reference stuff is really important to acknowledge, I think.

  • I too absolutely love people watching!, its even more interesting when you start learning a bit about human behavior and body language. I think we tend to me more honest with ourselves in public because it gives us direct comparison to what we think we should be like if we believe we are a certain way (hope that makes sense).
    I also try to imagine a persons bigger circle of people, and wonder how they spend Christmas day… weird I know lol

    • Not weird at all. I get it exactly. Actually. It could just be us being weirdos together. Haha.
      And what you said makes sense. Perfectly.

  • I’m probably opposite Suger. I live alone and generally don’t have anyone here to share things with so tend to be really open in my blogging (or tweets, FB etc) cos I feel the need to share something and that’s my only option…

  • I love people watching, although hate being watched! Its like when listening to someone, its not what they say but how they act when saying what they do. Body language is more telling and easier to read (does that make sense?) People are so different when not in the comfort zone of friends and family, much different when out and about by themselves. I sit and try and imagine what sort of person they really are by watching them. Does that sound creepy?

    • It does make sense. Body language is such a huge indicator. I love to watch people and their movements. So that makes two of us. It’s not too creepy at all. Promise. 😉

  • Maxabella

    I’ve always done my best thinking in crowds as well. When you’re alone in a crowd, you feel energised, but thoughtful. x

    • Agree. I find I feel the same way. Apparently, that makes us extroverts. We draw energy from being with people, even if we aren’t WITH people.

  • It so is. I use my phone tethered to my iPad for Internet. The free WiFi is terrible where I usually write. I never go online when I’m writing. It just distracts me and I get nothing done. I look for images later.

  • river

    Rats! Now I’m going to be conscious of my behaviour until something else takes over my thoughts.

  • I love people watching. I think to be able to find a corner and just write away would be so blissful.
    However, I would need a corner that the eye isn’t drawn to. Something I could camoufalge into because I am one of those types who doesn’t look at others. Who is off in her own world when out. I’m not comfortable being a part of crowds.
    Watching them though? I do enjoy that.

    • Mine is a corner. On a booth type seat. I love it there. I have wall on almost three sides {one is counter on the opposing wall} and I have a full view out. It’s my favourite spot. LOVE.