10 ways to love your body more now

When I asked readers of this blog about their number one problem they were dealing with in the area of confidence. Do you want to guess what the number one response was? The number one response was body confidence. How to have body confidence, where it came from and how to keep it when people around you are being jerks.

Being a predominately female audience this wasn’t surprising. It’s always about our bodies, have you noticed that? It’s a conspiracy folks. Seriously. So where do you start when you have a long way to go before you and your body are on lovey dovey terms? How do you recover from a body confidence slap in the face? Folks, I have been thinking about just that and have made a list.

10 ways to love your body more

10 ways to love your body more, TODAY.

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Be naked more often. 

Seriously. I know you’re all like WHOA hold on there Suger but it’s true. For every time you finish your hair and makeup naked in front of the mirror, maybe even wander through your house or lounge in your backyard {stop hyperventilating you lot, work up to it. Haha} you start to chip away at that idea that your body is something to hide. Something to be ashamed of. Hidden from view, even from yourself. 

Admire OTHER people’s bodies but not just the ones you deem perfect.

The end of that sentence is just as important as the start. Start to notice, letting the judgements roll off you like water, the bodies of the people around you. The imperfections, the beauty in each and every shape you see. Start to develop and obsession with bodies that aren’t your own in a positive way and see the results when you look in the mirror. All of a sudden your body won’t have to measure up to this impossible ideal, it’ll just be a body that you love a little bit more than you did yesterday. 

Take better care of your body. 

It’s my assertion that if you are bagging out the body you have and tut-tuting it every day that there’s a good chance you are treating it badly. Overfeeding or underfeeding it, over or under working it and all that jazz. So I’m telling you now care for it like you would if it belonged to a friend. Take better care. Get more sleep {Suger!}, take a walk, eat when you’re hungry and make it food that will nourish you when you can, lay off the stimulants and things that replenish you.  

Remind yourself of all the good your body does.

While you are standing around picking at every single thing you believe to be wrong about your body, the way it fails and the faults, it just goes on doing what it does. Breathing, pumping blood, holding your guts on the inside… All of it. As someone who has had numerous issues conceiving believe me when I say I know what it is like to look at my body and demand it do better, be better. But that sort of thinning doesn’t get you anywhere. You literally cannot live without your body, so give it a break, ok? 

Forget everything you have ever been told about your body ever.

They lied, short version. All the things they told you growing up were wrong. You don’t owe anyone anything. You are not the sum of your body parts and it’s not your job to be attractive to other people. Your body in whatever form, state of health and however far it has progressed through this thing called life is perfect just the way it is. Right now. It couldn’t be anything else. Like I said before, they lied, forget everything and get happy. 

Touch yourself, yup really.

Get familiar with the shape, the feel and the texture of your body. Get hands on. And not just for your health for such things as breast exams and all that but because getting touchy feely creates intimacy just like it would with anyone else that you were groping. I’m not talking about masturbation or intimate touching but the sort that is more PG friendly in the getting to know you sort of way. But you know what, if you and your body are disconnected masturbation might not be a bad idea anyway. Yup. I just went there. Get to know you body for all the good that it does for you. Stop treating it like some foreign object standing in the way of your dreams.

Stop saying you can’t do it.

Think I have some sort of body love super power? Like I woke up and there it was? Nope. It’s not the case. One day I decided that things were going to change for me. I wasn’t going to be spoken down to in my own head. The pressure from the world at large would not get to me because for the first time in my life I looked at it for what it is, an idea. Just an idea that I could choose to believe if it served me, which it didn’t, or not, which did. And you can too. Seriously. For a moment suspend your disbelief if you have it and trust me when I say if I can love my body, you can love yours. 

Get angry. 

Seriously. Start now. No one has the right to tell you how you should look. No one. Not your mother, not your partner, not your best friend. No one! And yet from a young age women {especially} are pulled one direction and the next. Do this, don’t do this, look like this, dress like that, eat this, don’t drink that and on and on it goes. What chance did you have? What chance did any of us have!? Get angry for a minute, it’ll make it easier to let all of that go so you can start fresh. Get angry, then get ready to start over.  

Become a raving body love fan. 

There are lots and lots of people out there determined to change the way that we look, talk about and think about our bodies. Go and find them, Google them and start to fill your head with that message for once. It’ll help in the forgetting of ‘everything you know’ thing. Replace the message that your body is somehow less than with more positive, affirming messages. Change the way the thoughts are wired in your head and start to really embrace your body in a way you didn’t know was possible. Let the body love folks loving goodness wash over you and you never know, you might just become one of us… *insert evil laugh here*

Remind yourself why it’s important.

Why does it matter to you anyway? Why is loving your body more important to you? Is it for you, for your family or because it occurred to you as a good idea? Take a deeper look and figure it out for yourself because knowing why you are doing it gives you something to hold onto those days that you suck at it. 

My reason why? Because there are young girls looking up to me and I want to show them the way. Because I wanted to stop feeling so freaking horrible about myself all the time. Because the voices of the women around me were deafening in the chorus of negative thoughts and ideas. They had been taught too. I could see it in them. In me. We all needed to change and we have. You’re next lady. 

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There you go folks. Hop to it, feeling good about yourself is closer than you think. All we have to do is undo like a billion years of cultural programming… Piece. Of. Cake. Haha. Let me know how you go, are going, went and all that. I’d love to hear all about it. Did I miss something that worked for you? Share it below so we can all benefit from it, please.

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*images via Unsplash here and here.

  • Mahina Hathaway

    ! You are one brave lady! And totally spot on :)

    I would also add write on your mirror things that you love about yourself. So then you see them everyday, every time you look at yourself. It makes a big difference.

    • http://www.sugercoatit.com/ Melissa Walker Horn

      Thank you Mahina. And yes, the mirror thing is a great idea! I use mine for to-do lists, this is way more fun. Haha.

  • Noela Ollenburg

    Thank you Suger for writing this… I am sure that these words of encouragement will help many girls. :) Noela

    • http://www.sugercoatit.com/ Melissa Walker Horn

      You’re welcome. I can only hope. x

  • http://www.prettyfluffy.com/ Serena Faber Nelson

    After getting hit by a serious illness earlier in the year, I can’t like this post enough! It really made me sit back and realise how much I had been taking my body for granted, and how instead of trying to starve and manipulate it, it should nourish it more. Now that I’m on the road to recovery, I’m 100% committed to looking after my body and loving it more.

    • http://www.sugercoatit.com/ Melissa Walker Horn

      Thank you Serena, I think that something like what you have been through is a wake up call the rest of us hope to never have. Hope you are well now! Nourishing your body, treating it with love and care is what matters when it all comes down to it.

  • http://www.lookseebynaomifenton.com/blog Naomi Fenton

    Thank you so much for writing this – I really (really) needed to read it right now! x

    • http://www.sugercoatit.com/ Melissa Walker Horn

      You’re so welcome Naomi. I’m glad it was here for you when you needed it. Sending you much love, I assume you need that too. x

  • Marianne

    Really late to the party on this one, but as always, I read it just when I needed it the most. My husband reminds me all the time that my body is an amazing thing, that has carried me through serious illnesses, pregnancies, joy and heartbreak, and keeps me going every day. Tomorrow I will hold my head up higher, and remind myself that my body is gorgeous in whatever I dress it in! !

    • http://www.sugercoatit.com/ Melissa Walker Horn

      I’m so happy to read this, that you will hold that head high. It’s a body, with a function and yet so much more than that. Go get ‘em Tiger!

  • http://www.creatingcontentment.com/ Sarah @CreatingContentment

    Finally got here! This is good suger. You are doing good sharing all this.

    • http://www.sugercoatit.com/ Melissa Walker Horn

      Thank you. I really do hope so. I’m glad you made it here.

  • Gabi

    Thank you for this very good post. I’m also on my way from hating myself( and trying hard to get back to my thinner me) to love this round and curvy body that I have now.
    As I started to accept myself and learn to love this body, I recognized, that I can be a good example for all the little girls and boys in the shool I work in. Showing them, that beeing a thicker person is not ugly or bad. Telling them the truth about different body forms. Telling them, that beeing a fat little child is not a thing that makes you beeing less valuable. It is sad that some of the little ones have already incured the body shaming thoughts from their families. Sorry, might be not the best english. I write from germany.
    Many greetings, Gabi

    • http://www.sugercoatit.com/ Melissa Walker Horn

      Gabi you did a beautiful job, thank you for sharing your comment. I do believe you can set a wonderful example to those children and hopefully some of them can escape from that shame sooner rather than later.

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